I'm Still Alive — You Fucking Amateurs Patch (2x3)

Stick this honest little proclamation on your hat and let the world know you survived last weekend’s plan B. Short, rude, and proudly stitched — perfect for people who prefer their humor blunt and their gear functional.

Made for the outdoorsy, the mildly reckless, and anyone who likes a patch that tells it like it is. Designed to snap onto loop panels on hats, bags, and jackets — because AXG Life is about accessories that actually do things. Life, Adventure-Ready, and borderline theatrical.

Key Features & Design

• Size: 2 inches high x 3 inches wide — big enough to read from a respectful distance.
• Backing: Hook fastener backing for quick on/off placement on loop panels.
• Compatibility: Ideal for hats, backpacks, jackets, and any loop-fastener panels you’ve already drilled holes into emotionally.
• Colors: Limited color variations available — what you see is what you get, so don’t be picky.
• Origin: Made in the USA.

Performance & Benefits

This patch does exactly one thing: it broadcasts your vibe without you having to say a word. It solves the age-old problem of not having a succinct insult/achievement statement on your kit. It’s durable enough to survive a rainstorm, a questionable life choice, and a weekend of “fixing” things.

Attach it in seconds with the hook backing — swap it between hats, bags, and jackets faster than your pals can ask what happened last night. Turns stuck weekends into hero stories and is built for midnight trail runs and questionable decisions.

Why it matters: Because your gear should reflect you: useful, a little sarcastic, and unapologetically honest.

Ready to add some attitude?

Toss it on your favorite cap or pack and let your kit do the talking. Add to cart and make your gear as brutally honest as you are.